Escape to Hawaii October 2021

It’s 12:59AM here in Honolulu. I have my laptop open and lots of pina colada in my system. Watching tourists, the homeless, the vast waters filled with melted sunscreen, couples on their honeymoon, listening to drunk conversations and tiki bar live music for two weeks in a row has gotten me unsatisfied. I still feel lost.

One thing I haven’t done yet as a soon-to-be 23-year-old college student is growing up. With the two voices of immaturity and inner granny always contradicting each other, I decided to take a leap of faith in finding joy running up an escalator going down. My knee aches from landing on my kneecaps. I tried, at least. I tried and fell, got back up. I laughed for an hour, and it was worth the pain.

When I was in San Francisco, I missed the warmth. When I go visit family in Florida, I miss the hustle and bustle of tech. Now that I am in supposedly paradise eating and drinking away, I miss the grind and the hunger of the city. It will be cold when I go back. I bet when I go back, I will miss the relaxed tempo and warmth.

So what’s the point of missing?

From this trip, I learned what to try. Doing something consistently for two years. One thing I can start is writing. This is number one out of one hundred. Just pick something and don’t let go. Put some work into the stone. Carve it, treasure it, knowing that you you yourself are a grain of sand in this world, and therefore the meaning is created. The importance of the rock matters to the one holding it.

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